What makes the difference between success and failure when we're trying to lose weight? Why can some people sail through the weekend or a social engagement without blowing their carb and calorie allowance to hell?
I've talked to hundreds of dieters. Newbies, old hands, students and professionals. Whenever the complaint is, ?When will staying on plan be easy?? the answer is always the same. ?When you make it automatic.?
I'm going to borrow a comment from Dr. Phil who says that no one breaks a habit, they merely substitute one behavior for another. Assuming Dr. Phil knows what he's talking about, how do we make this life law work for us?
Create rituals! Even confirmed party animals thrive on some degree of structure. During my weight loss phase what I found most challenging were weekends, Sunday mornings in particular. For well over 15 years, my husband would get up early and bring home an assortment of sinfully huge muffins or fresh warm donuts. I'd make vats of decadent dessert style coffee and we'd relax in caloric oblivion over the Sunday paper, planning our day, easing into our always hectic Mondays.
It's hard to break a 15 year old habit, but my 40s brought several surprises including divorce, bankruptcy and foreclosure. If there was ever a time for the comfort of my food and wine rituals, this was it. So, I did. To an extreme actually, because I gained another 40 lbs in only a few short months.
One afternoon I caught a sideways glance in a mirrored window. The prayer ?Holy cow, who's that woman? Glad I don't look like that,? crossed my mind for a brief second. Oops, then I realized I was looking at me. When did this happen? Is the mirror distorted? No.
How would I make this diet time different? Successful? I had no problem organizing my home, my children, my work so I decided to apply the same principles to losing weight. I knew very well that low calorie low carb was the fastest way and fast always appealed to impatient me.
Out came my planning pad and I jotted down everything I could think of that would make the difference between success and failure. Grocery list - check. Menus - check. Cooking plan since I cook in batches - check. Projects to keep busy and away from the fridge -- well, at least until my old friend, ketosis, took over and whisked away my appetite. Double check.
My list didn't include exercise. Why? Because I don't like it. Wish I did, I know it's terrific for your cardiovascular health, but I don't. However, if I did I'd have scheduled a quick 15 minutes when I first got out of bed. Get it done, out of the way and right before a hot shower! I also probably would have sneaked in an after dinner activity that didn't feel like exercise ? like walking laps at the park with the other moms or making a tennis date with friends instead of munching snacks in front of the TV.
The way I see it is that our rituals are whatever we decide them to be and we can change them at will. If we want to. Even if it's uncomfortable.
Drinking my 600 calorie cups of coffee was self-defeating. I don't care for black coffee, so what to do? Quit. Cold turkey. By the way, no one told me about caffeine headaches. Ouch! I was positive I had a brain tumor! But even more distressing was a decision about what to have first thing in the morning in lieu of coffee.
To most people this would have been a simple choice. Yeah, to most people. Honestly, I stood frozen in the kitchen like a deer in the headlights. If not coffee, what? Think, think. Change. Not my favorite mode, to be sure. But my 1200 calories a day in 2 huge mugs of coffee weren't part of my Kimkins plan. Gingerly I opened the fridge and briskly opened a can of Diet Coke. Who on earth drinks diet soda for breakfast? Me. And you know what? It only took a few days before it didn't feel so weird anymore.
Scientific studies show that it takes 21 days to create a habit. If you change a behavior or ingrain a new habit for just 3 measly weeks, you stand an excellent chance of success. Our challenge to ourselves is to not be overwhelmed. Maybe we won't be Kimkins poster kids solemnly sworn to our plan in 3 weeks, but we can darned sure strive to undo sabotaging habits like 600 calorie coffee (or Big Macs).
Do co-workers meet for drinks after work each Friday like clockwork? Well, you've got 5 days to figure out how you're going to handle it. I know it's outrageous, but maybe even skip the watering hole a couple of Fridays? Fearing dinner with the in-laws and grandma's never ending pasta bowl every Sunday? Figure a strategy. Maybe start a new in-law ritual with Sunday brunch ? ham & eggs are very Kimkins friendly.
What's my point? Look at the obvious field mines and c-h-a-n-g-e. If it's not helping, it's probably hurting. Change it. Examine your food and socialization rituals. Create new ones that work for the new you and your new goals.
Challenge yourself to succeed.
Kimmer struggled for years with morbid obesity before finally finding developing a weight loss program that worked for her. Four years ago she lost 200 pounds and she has been successfully maintaining at a petite 118 pounds since then. Now Kimmer devotes her time to helping other people lose weight at Kimkins.com. Kimkins.com is a thriving community with her effective weight loss plan, forums, one-on-one support, a chat and more. Visit Kimkins.com today and sign up for the free newsletter! | |
